Honor

Honor is a word with a rich history. It is one of a few concepts that has been lauded and aspired to by nearly every civilization in human history. You'd be hard-pressed to find a society where lying, cheating, unfaithfulness, or being two-faced were praised (although some might argue 21st century America is getting there). Fundamentally, we like to know that people are who they say they are, that they will do what they say they will do, and that they are worthy of trust because their thoughts and actions are always aligned. This trust is the essence of honor.

Striving to do the right thing, not simply to please others or to gain favorable status or rewards, is honor's beginning. If you believe basic behavior should not include lying or cruelty, understanding you would not want someone else to act that way toward you, and you proceed to live your life in a way that serves those around you and works toward fairness, kindness, and justice, then you are on the path. Honor is this commitment to a higher sense of right and wrong, even when it doesn't serve your temporary, worldly interests.

The sense people have of honorable actions can be viewed from three distinct angles. First, the sense of consistently feeling and then doing the right thing for ourselves. This happens alone, in the dark, when no one else is looking. Do we strive for consistency of thought and action, do we do what we know is right even when it doesn't serve our worldly comfort or success, and even when no one will see or learn of our actions? We should, because even if no one else sees you do it, you see, and you seeing is enough.

Second, the acceptance and adoration of those in our immediate circles. Do we have the trust and respect of the people near us, our family, friends, co-workers, neighbors and acquaintances? Do they see us saying and doing the things we believe even when it's hard? Do they see us making sacrifices for others, for justice or truth's sake? If someone asked your closest friends if you are trustworthy or honorable, what would they say?

Third, and broadest, is the sense of honor in a society as a whole. In an American snapshot we might say an honorable man's word is his bond. He is faithful to his wife, family, friends, country, and religion. He works hard at an honest job, obeys the law, and is willing to makes sacrifices of any kind for the people around him. Being good at your job is not enough in and of itself. Being famous, successful, smart, pretty, or faithful with some things but not with others has never earned people honor in America.

Many people liked President Clinton as a President, but no one would call him honorable. You can lie, cheat, steal, but still be a "good" President in America. But you're not honorable. Numerous pro athletes wow us on their fields of play, impress us with their huge houses and shiny cars, but let us down when they show us they have no honor. Chasing the team that will pay you the most money is perhaps a smart business decision, but when you've spent five years telling the world how much you love your city, your team, your coaches, and your fans, only to dump them the moment your contract is up and you're offered more to play on the other side of the country, you display a lack of honor. Your thoughts, words, and actions don't match. As a people, we really don't like that (unless you're a fan of basketball and like the Miami heat, then you might not mind so much).

Pat Tillman on the other hand is now considered one of the most honorable men in the 21st century, maybe even American history. His was a deep-seeded sense of right and wrong, something he had trained and developed from an early age. For those of you who don't know, Pat Tillman was a football player who played linebacker for Arizona State. He took the team to the national championships before being signed into the NFL by the Arizona Cardinals in 1998. As a player there he made about $516,000 per year, and at one point was offered a $9 million dollar contract to play for the St Louis Rams. He turned their offer down out of loyalty to the Cardinals. Honorable.
After September 11, 2001, Pat decided to finish his year in football (as he had agreed to honor his contract) and then enlist in the Army. The Cardinals offered him a $3.6 million dollar 3 year contract to stay, and he turned them down. Believing we had been attacked, and that he as an able-bodied American had the ability and duty to protect and defend the country, his sense of honor lead him to Afghanistan. After his first tour, a loophole in the re-deployment rules would have allowed him to return to America, his wife, and football without having to commit to a second deployment. Again, he turned the offer down and returned to the war, this time in Iraq. He was later shot and killed by friendly fire, and the cause and circumstances surrounding his death were altered and then covered up by the US military. Despite the horrors of his death and the military's treatment of it, Pat Tillman displayed the utmost commitment to honor at nearly every major decision of his young life. Again and again, his thoughts, beliefs, words, and actions matched up, and he has become for me one of the most bright and shining examples for honor I have ever seen.

So honor... what is it?
--honesty, fairness, or integrity in one's beliefs and actions
--a source of credit or distinction
--high respect, as for worth, merit, or rank
--high public esteem; fame; glory: He has earned his position of honor.

“The shortest and surest way to live with honor in the world is to BE in reality what we would APPEAR to be; all human virtues increase and strengthen themselves by the practice and experience of them.” ~Socrates


Now go practice being honorable. Yes.... it does take practice.